Winter of Discontent.

I am lamenting my own hedonism. I caved and ordered myself a pizza as a band-aid for my terminal ennui. Somehow this feeble attempt to cheer myself up just makes me feel more defeated.

My philosophy exam is in 16 hours and I've hardly cracked open a book; I attribute this gross neglect of my own academic welfare to a number of things: the weather, the fact that a lot of my friends and floormates are probably home and sitting by their Christmas trees already, a deep-rooted dislike of London Ontario, the harrowing decision of "to order a pizza or not to order a pizza," my discarded dreams of law school, my whacked-out sleep schedule, &c.

I want to be ordering Chinese with Steph or Dawson. Or singing songs in the car with J & K. Or breaking into Fort George with the boys. Or anything.
I want real life to go away.
I want to go home.

... I doubt even pizza can save me now.

(Edit: Turns out that, in spite of my pseudo-rebellious school-related apathy, I finished third from the top on my Anthro final. Pizza is now justified as a celebratory feast. I feel much better.)

Not-So-Objective Ministries.

So I found this website.

It's funny for a while, and then it just gets sickening. Long story short, I wound up wasting half an hour of valuable study time emailing this backwater Baptist motherfucker (pictured here in all his waxy/corpsey self-righteous glory):

"Dear Mr Paley,

I am a first year undergraduate student of English and philosophy at the University of Western Ontario. I wanted to share with you something we academics quickly learn upon arrival at such a highly-regarded and culturally-diverse university as this one, and that is the concept of objectivity, and furthermore, the idea of tolerance.

Of course, I am a “loopy Darwinist,” but I have always understood the idea of Creationism and allowed my Creationist friends to maintain their beliefs without preaching my “evil Evolutionist doctrine” to them. I do this because it is respectful, and true scholars are expected to be objective and to give concepts like religion and Creationism fair consideration despite our personal opinions. With that in mind, I have to say that I find your expressions of Creationist thought to be offensive, narrow-minded, and unintelligent; you are violating the academic credo not by promoting your Creationist beliefs, but by smugly attacking the Evolutionist viewpoint—a move that I deem cowardly, immature, and ultimately quite dangerous.

You, Mr Paley, are promoting a Christian-centric brand of hate and superiority. Sharing the “Word” with people is one thing—Christianity's high point is that it encourages hope and love, which I always think the world could use more of—but spouting insults against Evolutionists and including dramatic oversights on your arrogant blog (for example, the haphazard paraphrasing of that article on Nessie and circus elephants) is uncalled for and disgusting. You may dismiss my letter as some sort of demonized heretical rambling, but I am not preaching about the validity of Evolutionism; I am speaking towards human decency. Whether you like it or not, the members of your church are grouped together with all the Bhuddists, all the atheists, all the Jews, and all the indigenous “tribal” people of the world under the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. I’d like to remind you, now, of Article 1:

“All human beings are born free and equal in dignity and rights. They are endowed with reason and conscience and should act towards one another in a spirit of brotherhood.” (http://www.un.org/Overview/rights.html)

Mr Paley, you need to work on your spirit of brotherhood because you are setting a horrible example for your followers. We are all human, and your conduct is remarkably undignified and unacceptable in the year 2007, especially in these "academic" circles you claim to be a part of. Are your beliefs so threatened by contemporary society that you feel these measures are somehow justified?

Or maybe you feel that Hitler was an instrument of God too? I’m curious to know your thoughts on genocide because your slander is just a stone’s throw away. Maybe we atheists are wrong (and maybe you are too), but we all ought to agree that hate is never justified.

Sincerely,
(Me)"

Let it be known that if any fanatical missionary approaches me at a mall while I'm Christmas (pardon me, "Santamas") shopping, they're going to be leaving with my snow boots embedded in their face. (But don't tell "Dr" Paley that; it ruins my whole angle).

(.... What?!)

Edit: I am officially the biggest retard in the world.

Snow in 'The Forest'

Today was a fabulous day.

I woke up next to the boy this morning (afternoon, really), who, I've learned, is the most ingenious cure for migraines, and after reaching my sleep quota for the rest of my life--I swear--I headed off for a baking date at Breanne's. We made peppermint bark and shortbread, snacked on smoked salmon, and had an impromptu musical performance (because that's what arts kids do), then on the way home, the most miraculous thing happened.

It snowed.

But like, one of those real snows--dry and crunchy, not too heavy, not too windy--where the whole world just screams Christmas and all you want to do is run around in it like you're 10 years old again. So we did, and I've been humming Sleigh Ride ever since.


Tomorrow starts the rest of my life again; it's off to bed, and back to essays, cramming, and maybe a little dusting if I'm feeling ambitious.

(But all I want to do is make snow angels.)